FYI, after the “Irrational Generosity” post, a trusted spiritual mentor, Rob, actually he is half my age (note age has no correlation to spiritual wisdom), within minutes, sent me this You Tube for my review. It spoke exactly the truth Loretta & I needed to hear and notice I went to the trouble to place its 12 minute script in print (2900 words) so you can review it and better ruminate on its implications. I must say I’m intrigued by their other titles, a few of which are below.
Other Video You Tube Titles :
Jesus revealed In Every Book of the Old Testament
Don’t Fall For These 5 Satanic Traps
How To Talk WITH God and NOT TO God / Pray Effectively
How to LET the Holy Spirit LEAD Your Life
How to Differentiate Your VOICE and God’s VOICE
Five People GOD Commands You Not to Help! By “Illustrated Theology.”
If I told you that God commands not to help certain kinds of people, would you believe it? It almost sounds wrong to say that. We’re constantly told that Christians must help everyone, say yes to every request, and never refuse anyone in need. But, when you actually read the Bible carefully, you discover something surprising. God does not approve of every kind of help. In fact, there are certain types of people that when you help them, you’re actually disobeying the Lord and you may even be putting your own life at risk. Stay in this video until the end because I’m going to show you exactly who these people are.
- The first kind of person you should not help is the Manipulator.
Proverbs 12:22 states clearly “lying lips are abomination to the Lord but they that deal truly are His delight.” Look at the word God uses. Abomination. In other words, manipulation is not just a personality trait, not just the way they are, much less, emotional neediness. It is sin. God does not look at lies with pity. He looks at them with disgust, and when you support someone who lives in this game of deception, even without realizing it, you are not healthy. You are sponsoring their sin and you know the mistake most Christians make here, thinking that loving someone means saying yes to everything, that we are obligated to fix everyone’s problems. But that idea is wrong, because Jesus didn’t do that. There was a time when a man came to him and said, “Master, speak to my brother, that he divide the inheritance with me.” And how did Jesus reply? “Man, who made me a judge or a divider over you?” In other words, Jesus refused to get involved in that issue. Jesus did not allow people to place him in roles that were not His. He knew exactly when to help and when to say, “That’s not mine to handle.” He would not let himself be manipulated by a greedy man. So, understand this once and for all. If someone only remembers you when they need something, if they constantly back you into a corner with phrases like, “If you were a real Christian, you’d do this for me,” if they make you feel guilty for protecting your peace or your boundaries, that is not a cry for help, that is manipulation and helping a manipulator does not set anyone free. It only strengthens their control over you. That’s why sometimes the most biblical response you can have is not to extend your hand, but to cut off access. Love is not saying yes to blackmail. Love is saying, “I’m here for you, but I will not play your game.”
2. Now I need to talk about a Lazy person,
the kind of person that many Christian’s support, thinking they’re doing charity, when in reality, they’re getting in the way of what God wants to teach the lazy, and I’m not talking about someone going through a hard time, struggling with unemployment, trying to rebuild their life. That kind of person deserves help, encouragement, prayer, and support. The problem is the one who never takes a step, yet wants life to move forward by itself. They’re always asking for prayer, but have never bend their own knees, always asking for help, but never lift a finger to help themselves.
On this Paul, says in II Thessalonians 3:10 “For even when we were with you, we commanded you that if any would not work, neither should he eat. Pay attention to the wording “would not”, not “could not.” The difference is massive. Some people suffer because of things they cannot change, but others suffer because they chose not to make an effort, and what happens? You step in and help, you fix the situation. The person feels relieved and you think now they’ll change but they don’t. The following week they’re back and you help again. Then they’re back and you help again, until one day you realize the person is entrapped in hardship.
They’re comfortable in the dependency you built, and Paul continues saying, “There were some which walk among you disorderly, working not at all, but are busy bodies.” In other words, the lazy has no energy to work, but has plenty of time to gossip. The apostle is making it clear, if someone does not occupy themselves with what they should, they will end up occupied with what they shouldn’t, so if you’re carrying someone who refuses to walk, stop helping, not to abandon them, but to let God do what you’ve been preventing. Sometimes the fall you keep rescuing them from is exactly the push God wants to use to wake them up, so they can finally overcome laziness.
3. The Repeat Fool
Another kind of person you should not help is the Repeat Fool. This one is a specialist in draining your patience, because unlike the lazy, he seems like he wants help. He listens to advice, nods his head, agrees with every word you say; sometimes he even cries. He says that this time, it’ll be different and you believe it, but after a week, there he is again, in the same mistake, with the same speech, with the same empty promises. You pray for him, talk to him, give advice, send him Bible verses, sermons, videos, devotionals, and what changes? Nothing! Why? He doesn’t want transformation; he wants relief. He wants you to become his spiritual nursing home, where he can rest between one fall and the next, without ever having to truly decide to break away from what destroys him.
The Bible describes this kind of person perfectly. Proverbs 26:11 says, “As a dog returneth to his vomit, so a fool returneth to his folly.” Strong, yes! Disgusting, also! But that is exactly what happens. Some people leave a terrible relationship, only to enter another just like it. They get out of debt, and go right back to spending the same way. They ask for prayer over a sin, but change nothing in their routine, to overcome that sin. They don’t want deliverance, they want anesthesia, and then the question starts hammering in your head. “Do I have to keep helping? And the biblical answer is, “You help those who want to get out, not those who just want to rest between stumbles, because if you keep rescuing them every time, you are no longer a helper, you’ve become a lifeguard for someone who likes to drown.
The Bible is direct & explicit about this. Proverbs 23:9 says, “Speak not in the ears of a fool, for he will despise the wisdom of thy words.” In other words, do not waste counsel on someone who doesn’t want change, because your time is valuable, your energy is limited, and while you’re trying to save someone who doesn’t want to be saved, there is someone beside you who does want to be transformed, but you don’t see them, because you’re too busy rescuing someone who turned foolishness into a lifestyle.
4. Proud
If the fool wears you out by repetition, the proud wears you out by resistance. You show them the Bible, they argue, you give them advice, they roll their eyes. You point out the danger. They respond saying they know what they’re doing. And the most ironic part, sometimes this kind even comes asking for help, but on their terms. They want a solution without admitting they were wrong. They want healing, without confessing, they are sick. They want change, without humbling themselves.
About this kind of person, James 4:6 says “But he giveth more grace, wherefore he saith, God resisteth the proud, but giveth grace unto the humble.” Look at that word, resisteth. God opposes. God stands against pride. Translation, if even God is not helping someone because they refuse to humble themselves and admit their need, who are you to try?
And there’s more! Proverbs 26:12 says, “Seeth thou a man wise in his own conceit; there is more hope of a fool than of him.” In other words, it’s easier to convince a fool than a proud man, because the fool still knows he needs help. He may fall 1000 times but at some level, he recognizes he is lost, but the proud thinks he’s right. He’s not only in error, he is convinced his error is the right path, and someone who thinks they’re fine, will never seek change.
And remember the rich young ruler, Jesus spoke truth in love, showed him the way, offered him the chance to follow him. The man heard it, understood it, but preferred to keep the status and pride that came with his will. He didn’t just walk away sad. He walked away chained to his own pedestal and what did Jesus do, did he chase after him, saying “Wait, I take it back. I didn’t mean it that strongly!” Jesus let him go because some people only learn when they lose.
5. Quarrelsome One
Another kind of person you should not help is the Quarrelsome One, and I’m not talking about someone who defends the truth firmly. I’m talking about someone who creates conflict wherever they go. They fight at work, argue in traffic, stir up trouble in the family, cause division in the church, they are never wrong! They are always the one being mistreated, and you with your Christian heart, go there trying to be a peacemaker. You defend them, take their side, argue on their behalf, thinking you’re being righteous. But as soon as one war ends, they’re already in another, because they don’t want peace. They want attention.
Proverbs 19:19 speaks exactly about such a person. “A man of great wrath shall suffer punishment, for if thou deliver him, yet thou must do it again.” In other words, if you put out the fire that he himself started, get ready to put out another tomorrow, because he will create another mess. That’s why the Bible is stating clearly, “Do not help the quarrelsome one. Let him reap the fruit of his own chaos,” because many times, the discipline he needs, does not come in the form of a hug, it comes in the form of consequence, and you know what the danger is? If you keep rescuing him, You stop being a peacemaker, and become an accomplice.
You are not bringing peace, you are prolonging the chaos. Because as long as someone keeps bailing him out, he will never change. So, understand, it is not a lack of love to let the quarrelsome person feel the weight of their own choices. Sometimes the best help is to step aside and let God deal with them.
So in review, who are the five types of people the Bible says you should not help?
- First, the MANIPULATOR who doesn’t ask for help, but controls.
- Second, the LAZY who doesn’t want change, only comfort.
- Third, the REPEAT FOOL who keeps making the same mistakes and uses you as temporary relief.
- Fourth, the PROUD who wants a solution without admitting fault.
- Fifth, the QUARRELSOME who is always stirring conflict with everyone.
BOTTOM LINE:
Maybe now you have that question hammering in your mind, “But if I stop helping, am I sinning?” The answer is simple. It depends. If you are helping someone who truly wants change, keep going. The Bible commands us to carry one another’s burdens. But if you are sustaining sin, feeding your responsibility, or protecting someone God is trying to confront, then that is not love, it is disobedience.
Illustrated Theology Advertising:
Now if you want to go deeper in your Bible study check out my exclusive resource “Mind Maps” of all the books of the Bible designed to make your learning easier and more effective. You’ll also get bonus materials to take your Bible journey to the next level. Don’t miss out. Click the link in the description to get instant access and before you go, don’t forget to watch the next video that’s showing up on your screen. It’s one you won’t want to miss, “Stay in Peace.” See you next time!
